Maurice O'Neill
From CTYIwiki
| Maurice O'Neill | |
 |
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| Born | 2nd March 1995 |
|---|---|
| Years attended | 2009-2011 |
| Died | |
| Other names | Afro |
| Role | Student, Photoshop Artist, News Anchor |
| Home town | Kilkenny, Ireland |
Your Friendly Neighbourhood Black: This is a fantastical tale of wonder and mystery, the origin of why black people everywhere enjoy eating chicken daily. It all started a long, long, long time ago, when a man shrouded in mystery and wonder known only as Black Jesus, or Mr. T to you uneducated fools, was walking through a valley filled with mystery... and wonder. He came across a small village that had been ravaged by some sort of magnificent beast. Black Jesus came across a small child cowering in the ruins of the village and asked him what mystery and wonder had befallen the village. The boy told him about how a magnificent beast had been angered by the villagers and came down from it's magnificent mountain cave to attack the village magnificently. Black Jesus then travelled to the magnificent cave of the magnificent beast high up in the mountains of magnificence. There he came upon a huge avian like creature. It was featherless with magnificent golden brown skin, bones protruded from it's magnificent legs and it's head had been cut clean off. Black Jesus tried in vain to pity this particular fool but found that it was too magnificent to pity. They then engaged in an epic battle of epic proportions that destroyed all in it's path until they were both brought to a complete stand still. Neither could get the upper hand until Black Jesus tricked the beast into crossing a road, whereupon it was hit by a car... A magnificent car. Black Jesus then pitied the fool into oblivion defeating it. Black Jesus feasted upon the flesh of the beast to gain it's powers of magnificence so no fool would ever be too magnificent to pity. Black people everywhere now enjoy chicken in honour of Black Jesus' victory of said beast of mystery and wonder. It is also said that areas where the blood of the beast was spilled have become the sacred holy grounds now known as KFCs, everywhere. And that dear children, is why black people like fried chicken.
